It had rained that afternoon, a loud downpour lasting only a few minutes, but causing my students to race from their work to the window. I allowed them a moment to watch the droplets beat the pavement, then redirected them to their work and thought no more of it. I had no idea that this rain would be the most impactful rain I’d ever experienced.
A few hours later my daughter and I set out from school towards my parents’ house in Kimball, Nebraska. Avery was looking forward to attending her youth group at the church, and I anticipated with pleasure one of my mother’s warm, delicious meals and an enjoyable visit with my parents. There are two ways to travel to Kimball from the school in Albin, Wyoming. You can drive along paved roads south to Pine Bluffs and then west, or you can take a dirt road west and then head south, (which cuts off about 15 minutes or so). Wanting to make good time, and not taking into consideration the earlier downpour, I chose the dirt road.
Everything went well for awhile. Avery and I traveled along, talking, singing, and laughing, unaware of the dangers ahead. As we ventured further and further along the dirt road however, travel became a bit more difficult. I noticed that the mud was beginning to pull the car a bit. By the time I considered turning around, it would have been too dangerous and most likely impossible. The road had become so slick so fast, I realized I was no longer in control of my car. We slid precariously across the road and I was only just able to stop before we slid into the ditch on the opposite side. My heart was pounding, my chest tightened with fear, and my mind exploded with all the most horrible “what-if” scenarios possible.
After shakily attempting to reassure my daughter and taking several deep breaths, I tried to regain control of the situation. I carefully pressed on the gas in a feeble attempt at inching forward, but my tires were completely caked with mud and refused to move in any direction except closer to the ominous ditch. Heart racing and hands shaking, I opened my door to assess the situation. The thick mud had encased my tires so that they had no traction. I would not be able to get out of this alone.
I am an organized, goal-oriented person. I plan everything out. I purposefully use logic to make tactical decisions and avoid complications. I have a need to be in-control. It is devastating for me to feel helpless. Yet here I was, needing help, unable to fix the figurative and literal mess I had gotten myself stuck in. I felt helpless, desperate, and honestly terrified. Perhaps the worst feeling was the immense guilt that sunk like a rock in my stomach for choosing the dirt road after a rain. “I should have known better!” I scolded myself repeatedly.
For an independent, self-sufficient person like myself, it is hard to ask others for help. Yet, I had no choice. I called my dad. I knew he would be able to help me, whether it involved towing me or just giving me a lift until I could get my car towed. I was worried, tearful, and ashamed that he would see my failure to plan ahead, and my stupidity for taking the dirt-road. I was embarrassed by my helplessness, of not being able to solve my own problems, sorrowful that my mistake would cause him to leave his nice warm home and have to travel into the muddy danger himself.
Later I would look back and acknowledge the blessing that my phone had service and also that I was able to use my gps to explain exactly where I was. Dad answered the phone with overwhelming kindness and compassion. He immediately got in his truck and headed my way. He knew exactly what to do and was able to tow me out of the horrible muck.
The following days I reflected on how my dad rescued me, and I was reminded with conviction of the way my heavenly father has also rescued me. The parallels kept revealing God’s wonderful grace juxtaposed to my helplessness.
When I was stuck in the mud, I felt guilty, helpless, fearful, desperate, and hungry. When I was stuck in sin, I felt guilty for my ugly choices, helpless and fearful because I knew I could not change on my own, and desperate and hungry for renewal. I was figuratively stuck in a filthy mud pit. Isaiah 64:6 shows how dirty we are spiritually: “We are all infected and impure with sin. When we display our righteous deeds, they are nothing but filthy rags.”
Stuck in the mud, I called my dad, but when I was stuck in sin I called on my Heavenly Father. Psalm 50:15 says, “Then call on me when you are in trouble, and I will rescue you, and you will give me glory.” I was worried that my dad might be upset, or at least annoyed that I had gotten myself in this situation, but he answered with loving kindness. Our Heavenly Father also answers us in love when we turn to Him. Psalm 86:5 says, “O Lord, you are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for your help.”
It amazed me that my dad was so willing to leave the comfort of his nice warm house and drive into the dangers of the muddy road. Jesus gave up much more than that to save me. Philippians 2:6-8 “Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.”
When my dad arrived at the car, I was so relieved! Not afraid of getting dirty, he got out of his truck, knelt down in the muddy muck, and attached a chain from my car to his truck. Jesus attached our sin to himself: 2 Corinthians 5:21 “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” (NIV)
I asked my dad what I needed to do; should I put my car in neutral? Dad told me to try to drive with him, and to keep my car straight. As his truck dug in and began to pull my car forward, I gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles and did my best to keep it aligned. His truck made a straight path and my car followed right behind. Instead of being pulled to the side by the mud, my dad’s truck led me in the right way. When we submit our will to God, he also corrects our path. Proverbs 3:6 says “In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Perhaps we need to be a little more “white-knuckled” in following our savior, realizing that without His guidance we can easily be pulled into the wrong direction. “But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it.” Matthew 7:14 NLT
My Dad did not just pull me out of the mud and then leave me. He led me all the way home in case I got stuck again and I followed closely. Jesus did not atone for our sins and then abandon us. He admonished his disciples, “turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross and follow me.” (Matthew 16:24/Luke 9:23) How tragic would it be to not follow Him closely, to leave the safety of His guidance? I am deeply convicted by the countless times I have nonchalantly taken His words for granted, and tried to rely on myself rather than follow Him, each time taking a wrong turn, getting stuck and lost again and again. And each time I have called, He has returned to pull me out again and return me to the straight path.
That night when my dad came and pulled me home, I got out of the car and kissed his truck. I was so grateful, so relieved to finally be on steady ground I longed to embrace comfort and never leave it again. My mom’s delicious meal, the warmth of their home, and the knowledge of my parents’ amazing love for me were indescribable blessings. Someday we will be eternally home. We will reach the end of our journey here and be welcomed into the presence of our Heavenly Father and Savior. How much more deeply then will I feel relief, gratitude, warmth, and complete love?
I am thankful for the mud and muck that night. It was a life-changing reminder that I am not in control, that I am helpless, and in need of a savior. Even more important is that when I surrender and call on my Heavenly Father, He will answer in loving kindness and compassion. When I acknowledge Him, He will make my paths straight.
“Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; He will neither fail you nor abandon you.” Deuteronomy 31:8.
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